I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
