ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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