just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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