as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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