he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
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