If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize
