you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
