Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Randomize
