dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
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