I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
I have tasted many bathrooms
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize