There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
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