So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
