I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Randomize
