From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize