i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
