i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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