I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
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