the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Randomize
