On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
