that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
