I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
