Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
