is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
