Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
