Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
