i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Foreplay went from me being a bank teller and him a customer to us actually having to go to the bank so we would make rent
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
