Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
