shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
