Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
