i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
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