Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
