Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
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