Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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