I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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