dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Every concussion has its silver lining
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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