my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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