Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
