Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I have aggressive nipples.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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