you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Dude. I just woke up without a shirt or bra on. Apparently I fell asleep with a quesadilla in my mouth. I can feel my liver hating me.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
