I heard we made out
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I need to calm my uterus...
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
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