For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
Boobs are out for the taking
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Dear god my vagina.
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