Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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