She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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