ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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