come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
