he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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