i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
