i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
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