i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
How does one acquire holy water?
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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