i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
