im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
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