i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize
