just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
