Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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